Efrat, Israel - The first day of the month of Nisan is a great occasion of joy within Biblical history: it is the day when the Almighty declared His first commandment to Israel, “this renewal of the moon shall be to you the festival of the New Moon; it is to be to you the first month of the months of the year” (Exodus 12:2). Indeed, the midrash records that these Divine words were heard throughout Egypt, because they foretold that a most significant event was about to take place on this first of the yearly months, the Israelite nation was about to be born as it leaves Egypt amidst great wonders and miracles, a stupendous change was about to transform the political and social character of the greatest power in the world, the Egyptian slave society (hodesh, hidush, month, change, novelty).

Therefore, the whole of the month of Nisan is considered to be a holiday, so that “we are not to fall on our faces (by reciting the penitential prayer tahanun) for the entire month of Nisan..., and we are not even to fast (during this month) for a yahrzeit” (death anniversary of a departed parent - Shulhan Arukh Orah Haim 429 and Ramo-Rav Moshe Isserles’ gloss). The apparent reason for this festive quality of the month is the fact that Nisan is the month of our redemption. And this is especially true for Rosh Hodesh Nisan, the first day of the month of Nisan, when G-d’s word was heard throughout Egypt and the optimistic command of sanctifying the monthly renewal of the moon was given to Israel; indeed, this is probably the reason why the author of the Passover haggadah even suggests that the seder ought have taken place on Rosh Hodesh Nisan, were it not for the requirement of matzahand maror on the evening of the 15th of Nisan.

And yet, the same Rav Moshe Isserles who forbids fasting on a yahrzeit during the month of Nisan and who generally forbids a bride and groom from fasting on their wedding day if they are married on any Rosh Hodesh (first of the month) throughout the year - since a bride and groom are forgiven all of their prior sins on their wedding day, they are by custom enjoined to make the day before their wedding a mini Yom Kippur fast up until the marriage ceremony - does specifically enjoin the bride and groom to fast on Rosh Hodesh Nisan! (Shulhan Arukh, Orah Haim 572, Ramo, Rav Moshe Isserles). And the Mishnah Brurah (Rav Yisrael Meir Kagan, known as the Hafetz Haim) agrees, although other authorities consider it “a great wonder” (Aruk Hashulhan, peleh gadol). How can we explain the tradition allowing a bride and groom to fast on Rosh Hodesh Nisan?

In this week’s Torah portion, we read of a horrific tragedy which occurred specifically on Rosh Hodesh Nisan, on the very eighth day which culminated the dedication of the Sanctuary: Nadav and Avihu, the two sons of Aaron the High Priest, were consumed by a Divine fire during the high point of the religious ceremony.

Why was a day of such religious sensitivity and significance transformed into such tragedy and terror? And why express the agony of what was supposed to have been a day of ecstacy in the fast of a bride and groom on that day?

According to our most classical commentary Rashi, Nadav and Avihu were righteous individuals, even more righteous than Moses and Aaron. “Said Moses to Aaron, ‘My brother, I knew that the Sanctuary would be sanctified by those closest to the Divine, but I supposed that it would be by me or by you. Now I know that they (your two sons) are greater than we are” (Rashi ad loc).

Why does the sanctification of the House of G-d require such two sacrifices - the best and brightest? The sacred text doesn’t explain itself, it merely ordains and decrees. The Divine Presence is a flame of fire - and fire purifies, purges, but it also consumes. All the way back at the dawn of our faith, at the very beginning of G-d’s first covenant with Abraham, “a deep sleep fell upon Abram, and behold a great black terror descended upon him - blood, fire and a pillar of smoke” (Genesis 15:12). The Prophet Ezekiel cries out, “And I see that you (Israel) are rooted in your blood, and I say to you ‘By your blood shall you live, by your blood shall you live’” - and we recite these words at every circumcision ceremony. We here in Israel see the blood, fire and pillar of smoke at every homicide-suicide attack of terror. Apparently it is as Hillel understood it: the matzah of freedom must be joined to the marror (bitters) of sacrifice. So it has been ordained.

The Sanctuary of G-d is the nuptial home in which the Almighty and His beloved bride Israel are to dwell together. Every bride and groom are a reflection of G-d the groom and Israel the bride - and every marriage has moments of tragedy as well as joy, of fasting as well as feasting a Jewish marriage is the ultimate expression of Jewish faith in a glorious future despite the rootedness in blood, of Jewish belief “that there will be heard in the streets of Judea and the great places of Jerusalem the sound of joy and happiness, the sound of bride and groom” despite the exile and persecution.

And so Aaron is silent, “Va yidom Aharon”, when faced with the tragedy of his sons’ demise. He realizes that there are Divine decrees which must be accepted rather than understood, just as the Klauzenberger Rebbe, who lost a wife and thirteen children in the holocaust, would always interpret the words of Ezekiel, “bedamayikh hayii - by your silence do you live” (dam can mean blood, but also silence) - because had the Jews lashed out at G-d in anger, they could never have rebuilt their lost Jewish world in America and Israel.

In a Munich Synagogue a few months ago, I witnessed another kind of silence. There were about one-hundred people in shul- but only the Cantor and I were praying. Everyone else was talking - but not the hushed tones in which neighbors generally speak during the Prayer Service but in loud conversations, even occasionally walking from place to place as they spoke, seemingly totally unaware of the praying and Torah reading going on at “center stage.” My host explained it very well: “These Jews are all holocaust survivors or children of holocaust survivors. They’re angry at G-d - so they can’t, or won’t speak to Him. But neither can they live without Him. So they come to shul, they don’t speak to Him, but they speak to each other...”

What should bride and groom - symbolic of the eternal relationship between G-d and Israel pray to G-d about when they fast on their wedding day, even on that day of agony and ecstasy, Rosh Hodesh Nisan, which portends the ultimate Nuptial Home in which there will be no blood or tears. I believe that bride and groom, representatives of Yisrael Sabba, Israel - G-d eternal, ought recite Psalm 83:

“Lord, You do not be silent, Do not keep quiet and do not still Your voice, O G-d.Because Your enemies are shouting and your foes are lifting their heads. They are saying ‘Let us destroy them from being a nation, let the name Israel never again be remembered. Let them know, G-d, that Your Name alone is the highest over all the earth.”

Shabbat Shalom.