Q & A - WITH RABBI RISKIN
Question: I slandered one of my friends, and as a result he missed an opportunity for promotion at work. My friend doesn't know that I am responsible for disseminating the slander, and I am now forced to admit that I lied. It's hard for me to say why I did it: I gained no benefit from what I said. Must I now confess to him and ask his forgiveness? I'll lose a friend, and I'm certain that he'll be really upset, and no good will come of it.
Answer:
don't believe that you have to confess to your friend since, as you point out,
it will only upset him more. It would simply be your own attempt to clear yourself and
your conscience, but it will do your friend no good. What you need to do is to confess
to the person to whom you told the lies. Also, if your friend lost money as a result of
your actions, you must find a way to reimburse him with that sum at the earliest
opportunity.
